tell me some jokes

Here are some dad jokes and corny jokes that might make you laugh:

1. Dad Jokes:
   • Why did the horse trip over? Because it was tired and couldn’t giddy-up!
   • Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the “P” is silent.
   • What do you call a well-balanced horse? Stable.
2. Corny Jokes:
   • Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired.
   • What did the triangle say to the circle? You’re pointless.
   • Why was Cinderella so bad at soccer? She kept running away from the ball!
3. Recent Jokes:
   • Why do ducks have tails? To hide their butt quacks.
   • My friend had surgery to transition from a man to a woman. I asked her, 'Of all the things they cut, what hurt the most?' 'The salary,' she said.
   • The famous Colonel called up the Pope and asked him to change the daily prayer from 'Give us this day our daily bread' to 'Give us this day our daily chicken'. The Pope replied, 'I am very sorry. That is the Lord's prayer and it isn’t something I can just change the words for.' So the Colonel, disappointed, hung up. After another month of bad sales, the Colonel panicked, and called again. 'Listen your Excellency. I really need your help. I'll donate $50 million dollars if you change the words of the daily prayer from 'Give us this day our daily bread' to 'Give us this day our daily chicken.'" And the Pope responded, "It is very tempting, Colonel Sanders. The church could do a lot of good with that much money. But, again, I must decline. It is the Lord's prayer, and I can't change the words." So the Colonel gave up again. After two more months of terrible sales, the Colonel got desperate. 'This is my final offer, your Excellency. If you change the words of the daily prayer from, 'Give us this day our daily bread' to 'Give us this day our daily chicken' I will donate $100 million to the Vatican.' The Pope replied, 'Let me get back to you.' So the next day, the Pope called together all of his bishops and said, 'I have some good news and I have some bad news. The good news is that KFC is going to donate $100 million to the Vatican.' The bishops rejoiced at the news. Then one asked about the bad news. The Pope replied: 'The bad news is that we lost the Wonder Bread account.'

These jokes are sure to bring a smile to anyone’s face, especially with their silly puns and playful twists on common phrases.